I Want

by Ben Seal

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about

‘I Want’ is a journey into the gender identity of our protagonist. As a gender non-conforming surfer/skateboarder Ben likes nothing more than getting their plaits in a tangle at a skate park or attempting to surf one of Scotland’s easier east coast breaks. It’s also a love letter to an old friend who is a trans-woman skateboarder and custom hot-rod builder in California. ‘I wanna go surfing I wanna be perfect’ reflects on the nature of desire in lockdown and a person's need to be able to express themselves. It’s also a call to anyone struggling to marry their diverse identities, whether that’s cis or trans, masc or femme!

lyrics

I Wanna Go Surfing
I wanna be perfect
I wanna be smashed with your energy
I'm letting you know that It's gonna be worth it
When I accept this shhh that's been happening to me
It's gonna be worth it
It's gotta be worth it

All this straight-acting got me bummed out bummed out
All this straight-acting got me bummed out bummed out

I wanna feel pretty
I wanna deserve this
I wanna hold who I hold so close to me
I wanna burn with love now and know when it's working
I wanna smash and burn all the walls round me
know when it's working
Is it too much to work it

I'm gonna be girly
I'm gonna still skateboard
I'm gonna chip my nails on some hot machine
I'm gonna eat early and still get my hole filled
I'm gonna tie up my them-friends and let them breathe
I'm gonna still skateboard
Like some hot machine

All this straight-acting got me bummed out bummed out
All this straight-acting got me bummed out bummed out
All this straight-acting got me bummed out bummed out

I wanna go surfing I wanna be perfect
I wanna go surfing I wanna be perfect
I wanna go surfing I wanna be perfect
I wanna go surfing I wanna be perfect
I wanna go surfing I wanna be perfect
I wanna go surfing now that'll be worth it
It's gotta be worth it

credits

released March 12, 2021
Dan Gautreau mixed this beauty and Ben did everything else

license

about

Ben Seal Scotland, UK

"...It sounds like ELO and Perfume Genius delightfully engaging in frottage, with Prince watching, desperate to join in. What’s not to like, essentially? Pass the glitter."
The Tempo House

discography

Meet Me in the Fire

Jul 2022
I Want

Mar 2021
DEATH & MORE

Oct 2020
GLORY - Radio Edit

Sep 2020
C U Around

Jul 2020
TRUTH

Apr 2020
DEATH

Feb 2020

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